the kids with their Great-Grandma

the kids with their Great-Grandma, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

This picture was taken last summer. My grandma passed away almost two weeks ago, 8 days shy of her 96th birthday. I'm so glad that my kids got to meet their great grandmother and enjoy her smile. They'll never know her the way I know her. I loved my summer visits in Kentucky. I loved them even more once there was an indoor toilet and shower. :)

Julia went with me and Sean to the funeral. I adored watching her pick wildflowers during the graveside service. I'm pretty sure my grandma would have adored it too.

My aunt lives on the property where my grandparents' house still stands (unoccupied and in need of serious work). My daughter was sad that the kittens I played with when I was young were no longer there (I tried to explain it. Several different ways. Didn't work.).

chalk kids

chalk kids, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

The kids are now 8 and 10. I love that they're still great friends. They play together a lot (and fight a lot too). I'm glad that JW was wearing a dress so that you can tell which chalk outline is the girl one (in case the hands on the hips didn't give it away). :) When I mentioned to JT that he looked like a penguin, he said that he stuck out his hands because he wanted them to show. They are both so stinkin' adorable. Wrapped around their fingers I am. And happy to be so.

Allerton in late October

Allerton in late October, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

I love all of Allerton, and I can't pick a favorite spot to save my life (when have I ever been able to pick a favorite of anything?), but I have a special affinity for the south woods. Not that I've run into a lot of people when hiking on the other side of the river, but I usually only see a couple of people (if any at all) in the south woods. I see more wildlife. The dog can roam free for a bit (shhh . . . don't tell anyone!). Fall in the woods is a wonderful time. The leaves are thick on the ground, but moist enough that it's not a constant crunching sound under your feet.

I love autumn.

Guana: the beach

the beach, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

This is where we spent our honeymoon: Guana Island in the British Virgin Islands (www.guana.com). I can't imagine anywhere else being more perfect. No TVs, no radio. Just us, hiking, eating, drinking, sleeping, snorkeling, talking, relaxing. I never imagined that I could spend an entire day lounging on a beach, but it turns out I can. (And I can't wait to do it again!) This is where we sat and read, swam, snorkeled and pretty much just lazed while sipping Painkillers and enjoying the peace and stillness that Guana offered up to us.

Showing our respects at Arlington

Showing our respects at Arlington, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

For spring break we took a road trip to DC. We found ourselves with some extra time one day and went to Arlington National Cemetery. We had already done quite a bit of walking that day so bought tickets for the bus and stood in line waiting for quite a while. Someone (no, no, certainly not me!) got them riled up while waiting and once we got on the bus I turned around to take a picture of Sean and Jasper, on the seat behind me and Julia, and this is the result. Two camera hogs. Sheesh. What, were they raised on a funny farm?

Chained to these loving arms

If I was a saint I would not cry
If I knew better I'd just get by
If I was a child I wouldn't worry
But all they understand is a poker face
And a winning hand
Go tell it to the jury
Well, now, dreams are not the only stuff of life
I know that well, 'cause I'm lying safe and sound in your
arms tonight
And I'm Chained To These Lovin' Arms
Chained To These Lovin' Arms
Ain't never gonna leave them
(Patty Larkin)

Hey, there

I haven't been around much, have I? I haven't been taking very many pictures, and I've been busy with wedding and life planning besides. Here are my three favorite people, on New Year's Eve, doing one of my favorite things: reading.

Even though I know better, I tend to measure myself by other people's yardsticks (or however that phrase goes). I've been getting away from such behavior and looking at the three people above helps keep things in perspective. I know what a wonderful life I have, and I'm thankful for it.

p.s. My son is not naked. I don't know why I feel the need to state that, but I do. :)

instant tourettes

instant tourettes , originally uploaded by Jen!!.

I swear, I'm well coordinated. I hardly ever run into doorways. I almost never trip. I can walk and chew gum at the same time for goodness sake!

Apparently shaving off part of my pinky over the summer wasn't enough. On Friday I cut off part of my thumb while chopping onions.

*sigh*

So, once again, let's count our blessings: the kids were with their dad, the roads weren't icy, the ER wasn't busy, I didn't cut to the bone, the knife was sharp, I just had my tetanus shot in 2005, the ER crew was AWESOME, my rockin' fiance held my hand (my other hand) through the whole thing, the bleeding finally got stopped, the pharmacist who doled out the vicodin put the cap on in the non-child-lock position, and so much more.

And when I asked for a glass of red wine at the ER the doc said that someone could run out to the liquor store. (I held out for the drugs instead. A wise choice, I think.)

Near the Gateway Arch

Near the Gateway Arch, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

On our recent trip to St. Louis we stopped for a moment, under the beautiful canopy of trees, in their full autumnal colors, to snap this picture.

Julia is being goofy, as she is wont to do, and I'm not sure why she's holding the stick like that or making the face she is, except that it might somehow be related to her being six.

Jasper is hiding behind the tree, pouting that we had to leave the Museum of Westward Expansion early due to his less than stellar behavior.

There you have it: one small, momentary glimpse into fractured family life in America.

Kickapoo

Kickapoo, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

I haven't posted in a while. Mark it up to sheer laziness. The camera hasn't been being picked up as much, I've been busy, *she* started it, there's gum in my hair and, oh, there's a really fun election coming up.

And in the midst of it all, Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich has decided to take action against the state budget shortfalls by closing some state parks (he's also cutting over 150 jobs at DCFS, and it appears that my employer, a state school, will also be feeling the pinch). The state park closures are, from what I understand, temporary. Temporary or not, it saddens me. I spend a fair amount of time at Kickapoo, one of the parks slated for closing, and will miss stomping through the snow there this coming winter.

This picture was taken by one of my kids when we went there yesterday. Some of the trees were changing, some were already missing all their leaves, and most were still green. The kids love going there. It always amazes me that they can leave behind their electronics, their board games and their books and open their eyes to the beauty that surrounds them. The smells yesterday were wonderful. Wet earth, with fresh, crunchy leaves underfoot, makes for a great day.

oh dear

oh dear, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

Is this what they're (or is that they'r?) teaching in public schools these days? This is from my son's homework notebook and his third grade class uses it to jot down notes about what they're talking about each day.

School is back in session

I love this time of year. Not only do I like having more of a routine (I could do without the overcrowded schedule though), but I love seeing the kids really excited about something. Some days it's what they learned or what game they played with their friends, some days it's what they ate for lunch. My son, at 8 1/2 is almost too cool for himself. At least he was trying to be. Then the smiles broke through and he started playing around. The best part of the first day was seeing all the kids who haven't seen one another all summer running up to each other. Any disagreements from last school year have been erased. All they remember is that they're friends.

Hands

Hands, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

Julia loves to use her new skills that she learned in kindergarten. She's reading books like a champ and writing stories whenever she gets a chance. She finds inspiration in everyday things and also uses stories to express her emotions (like the one she wrote in the middle of a crying fit to explain to me why she was crying. It all goes back to her taking the eggs out of the refrigerator, but that's a whole 'nother story right there.).

I love this story: Your hands can touch. You can use your hands to make a silly face that you can't do by yourself.

remember when. . .

rainbow, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

a rainbow could change your whole outlook?

This one put a smile on my face earlier this week, but didn't lift the weight off my shoulders. On the plus side, I'm sorta getting used to the weight and starting to think that it's just part of life. The unbearable lightness of being. The weight of living each day as if it's my last is starting to feel like a burden, even though it's just habit now. I realize that most people don't live that way. I certainly didn't live that way for years and years. What I've found that it means to me: not passing by opportunities. That's not just big things. That includes the chances to slow things down and stop to smell the flowers. Except for the short and loud people, I don't really seem to know or be close with anyone else who lives that way.

Call me out. Tell me I'm wrong. Then let's go do something.

Sky time!

On the way to the drive in, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

I love living in an area that still has a drive in movie theatre. It's about a 40 minute drive from my house and when we (me, my love and his dog) went to see a movie on Saturday night I was distracted by the sky. My camera phone doesn't begin to capture how beautiful it was. So many storms have been moving through the area that sunny skies alone are enough to put a smile on my face, but man oh man *this* sky was extra special. The multitude of textures and colors . . . simply awesome.

Mount Hope Cemetery

cemetery, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

So I had to decide--blog another photo of my kids or another one of a cemetery. How do you like my choice? I snapped this shot with my camera phone while out for a walk in the middle of the day a week or two ago. It was a beautiful day and I wish the camera could have captured more of that.

My kids are probably too young at this point for me to have a conversation about what to do with me when I die (besides having swag bags at the funeral!), but I'm not convinced that I want to be buried somewhere. If that's what they want, they'll get their way. Does anyone out there feel passionately about what happens to their remains after they're gone?

statues at Allerton

statues, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

By golly, what have I been up to during the past month that I haven't gotten a picture up here? I've taken two trips, sans camera, so no proof except for my memories. I've also been to Allerton a couple of times, including this time with my kids. In the Lost Garden they went through about six different poses pretending to be statues on the bases that remain there. That gives me an idea! Anyone know an artist who makes gargoyles? I'd love to have my kids likenesses that way.

Sweetness

jasper being ever so gentle with his cousin michael, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

Jasper didn't get a chance to hold his baby cousin the first time we met him. At Julia's birthday party, he finally got his chance! He was so tender with him. When Michael started fussing, Jasper didn't quickly ask if someone could take him. (But when I offered to take him, Jasper quickly took me up on it.) Jasper is amazingly good with younger kids (besides his sister). He will do anything to get his other cousins to laugh--especially if it involves silly dances, falling down, or contorting his face.

I should say, just to be fair to him, that J is good with his little sister. But they are siblings after all.

Happy birthday, my darling six year old

Allerton, originally uploaded by Jen!!.

I'm feeling a little blue today (for various reasons, none of which need to be discussed here) so I went looking for pictures that make me happy. This one makes me happy. The little punk is getting into my camera bag and was caught red-handed. I love that grin.

She left me a message this morning and it brought tears to my eyes. It wasn't so much what she said (although that whole "best mom in the whole world" thing was kinda cool) but that she sounded so *old*. So not five anymore. I thought these things were supposed to be gradual. I thought a birthday was supposed to be pretty much like any other day. Clearly, I was wrong. Chalk this one up to "something new every day."

wink wink

wink wink
Originally uploaded by Jen!!

There's some controversy over at Flickr these days. Some folks don't like that short videos are now allowed. I'm not certain that I've yet formed a solid opinion about it, but overall I think it's kind of cool. It means that if I have a video of under 90 seconds that I want to share I'll be able to do it in the same place as where I share my pictures. Makes good sense to me.